CRABBY'S PET THEORY ON ADOLESCENTS AND THE CHURCH (or ON ONE LEAVING THE OTHER)

Much has been made of the recent studies which show adolescents and young adults increasingly checking the "none" box when asked which religion they identify with.  While more are describing themselves as atheists, that only covers a small number among the young folk.  Most could be named as "seekers" or belonging to that ambiguous category "spiritual but not religious".

Among the youth formally churched (much of the time ex-evangelicals), a number of reasons have been suggested.  One being the stance of many of those churches which oppose homosexually and gay marriage.  ("…disproportionate focus on homosexuality that consistently dehumanizes, stigmatizes and marginalizes gay and lesbian people.")  Others that many churches have provided a thin gruel to contemporary youth that had not changed much from pre-school to high school--in other words, they were not properly "discipled" and catechized--thus are severely unable to deal with the challenges of a increasingly secular culture.  Others cite a revulsion to the Christian right leanings of the elders.  And so it goes.  The oft repeated summary that is heard is: "“I don’t think I’m an evangelical anymore. I want to follow Jesus, but I can’t be a part of this."

Some focus has been lent to what has been referred to as the "emergent" church.  It is here that a number of complains concerning against the established conservative churches are clustered.  The literal interpretation of the bible.  The wholesale rejection of evolution.  The limitation of the role of women at home and in the church.  The opposition to homosexuals and gay marriage.  Championing of conservative politics and "over-involvement" in political affairs in general marking just how misaligned evangelical priorities have become..  Ignoring the threats to the environment.  And the teaching of "conservative" [historical] heterosexual sexual ethics--focusing the few verses that deal with sexuality but the many about the poor and poverty so easily ignored.  The irony in these charges is that for the emergent churches advocacy of the opposite of these is where their heart is.  While they tend to favor the older, richer forms of liturgical worship, their outlook is liberal.  In that sense, they more closely resemble the established mainline churches. 

However all this may be (and I should say that I have much sympathy with a number of their objections), I believe there are two main, more significant, more honest underlying reasons disaffected youth desert the church:  sex and alcohol.  It is little secret that as they progress through their teenage years, even the churched young adolescents take up drinking (and drugs) and having sexual intercourse with boyfriends or girlfriends.  Much of the time, their behavior is little different from that of their contemporaries.

Premarital sex has become a "built-in" in the relationships of teenage boys and girls in our culture.  Their social networks are persistently supportive boys and girls getting naked and jumping into together.  "Three date rule" or no "Three date rule", sex has become an expectation in dating--even absent dating itself.  These anticipations are strong and powerful even within Christian youth groups.   Virginity becomes less and less supposed as a youth progress through adolescence.  Instead, sexual experience becomes something a portfolio to be shared among one's friends and other interested parties.  Such a free atmosphere can and does lead even the most modest to believe there is nothing essentially wrong with sharing one's body and satisfying one's overwhelming teenage hormonal cravings

All by itself, alcohol and other intoxicant have their own intrinsic appeal.  Indeed, adults as well as adolescents frequently are perfectly comfortable get buzzed or high while alone.  But more commonly alcohol is used in groups--often times as a social lubricant.  As small children, Kool-Aid and cookies was enough to have a good time with other children.  But in adolescence, social unease and reticence requires something stronger--or so it was believed.  Of course, alcohol (and drugs like marijuana) often is a gateway for young men and women to put themselves forward to meet one another--intoxication providing a pretext to do what they already wanted to do in the first place.  More the point, social drinking and drug use can provide a prelude to sex.  Alcohol and sex are a powerful combination for adolescents.  Especially with the comprehension that one often follows the other.

(Of course, one must keep in mind the perplexity many present day youth have as to what certain kinds of sexual activity is actually is considered sex.  Often anything short of genuine intercourse is thought of as mere play between young men and women--particularly oral sex.  Such conceptual cordoning off of sexual behavior is foreign to their elders.  In any event, intercourse is largely frequent and common among the youth anyway--although the romantic aspect is not necessarily required.)

In addition, there a hidden aspect in sex, smoking, and alcohol for the young.  To adolescents, they represent freedom.  They provide occasions away from the heavy expectations society places on teenagers--a glimpse into the independence and liberty of adults-- independence and liberty muscularly coveted by teenagers. 

Then comes the church.  The churched adolescents find themselves sitting in the pews confronted by their behavior and the moral teachings of historic Christianity.  Most for a while avoid thinking about the conflict between the two.  Some just conclude the Church doesn't know what it's talking about--besides, what they're doing can't be all that bad.  Some believe it is quite possible to be a loving disciple of Christ while indulging in alcohol and sex at the same time. 

But then there are those who can't make peace with their behavior and the teachings the Church.  Being in church, whether in worship, youth activities, or Sunday school, only creates a sense..call it…of cognitive dissonance, or more to the point guilt.  On the one hand, they know they should stop.  On the other hand, they won't.  They are overwhelmed with the knowledge they are hypocrites and being a hypocrite is one of their worst charges they hold against the adults sitting next to them.  The hypocrisy of adults--failing to live up to what one preaches, is all too evident to teenagers--at least what they think they know about their parents and their kind.  They see how adults so easily absolve themselves for sins which should require deeper reflection and repentance.  Judgmental? You bet.  When it comes to adults, young people are quite judgmental.  By nature, they have little compassion for the weaknesses and human foibles of the elders.  That doesn't mean they aren't often target on the failings of adults around them.

Be that as it may, young people distain the hypocrisy of their elders--and they can't stand to see it in themselves.  The guilt of what they do and guilt they feel not living up to the faith they feel obliged to keep becomes too much.  It is a tension teenagers feel they must resolve.  So, all too often, they leave.  Yes, sex and alcohol are  exhilarating.  But they are intoxicated by freedom most of all.

This is a tragic state of affairs.  I am not sure what is to be done about it.  There is a lesson which I am not sure young people can hear.  It comes having lived and tread down the road of living.  Through the trials and bitter experiences, the adult sitting in the pew knows that he is inescapably a hypocrite,  He has lived too much and failed too often.  Even when he does the right thing, he does it for the wrong reasons.  Often to "save their own skin" rather than from a pure heart: a heart attuned to the heart of Christ.  As St. Paul remarked, the good he wants to do he doesn't--and the evil he doesn't want to do he does.

The old question is posed: if the authorities turned oppressive and persecuted Christians, would there be enough evidence to convict you?  Maybe yes.  Maybe no.  But the authorities have no capacity to look into the heart and see who is a true Christian.  Left to ourselves, we all have our doubts about ourselves.  We can call ourselves Christian; but we are not really not that different from those who do not.

Whatever else he is, the repentant adult knows he is a corrupt sinner who has no way out.  He has a life that cries out against him.  A malefactor who has no way to make himself holy.  A sinner that can only be covered by Christ's righteousness before the throne of God.  A God so holy that no unclean thing, no sin, can come into His presence.  

It seems that some young men and women may know this intellectually; but very few adolescents and young adults feel it their hearts.  They haven't lived enough and sinned enough.  They habitually think their own sense of their personal failures are in a sphere all by themselves--untouched by the Gospel.  That is, the promise of the Gospel seems so beside the point.

Others take a more sociological approach.  They look to more cultural forces at work.  They have their points.  Points which not be discounted.  I have taken a more personal, "psychological" look.  As I said in the beginning, this my pet theory.  But I have proposed it out of personal experience and the related confidential experiences of my contemporaries.  If I do say so myself, it deserves some consideration and thought.